“Strength and growth only come from continuous effort and struggle” said famous self-help author, Napoleon Hill.

Growing up as a Pakistani-American Muslim, seeing women relatives wearing hijab, I vividly remember knowing I would do the same. However, in the eighth grade, I began questioning my decision. I wondered if I wanted to be any more different than I had already seemed. As a brown girl with an unusual name who didn’t eat bacon like everyone else, people already knew I practiced a specific faith.

I reluctantly started wearing a headscarf without being cognizant of its significance. After a lot of research on the primary objective of the Islamic concept of “hijab” (covering), I felt as if I had ascertained its essence. The concept of “hijab” is prevalent amongst both Muslim men and women to maintain their modesty. Islam enjoins men to lower their gaze and for women to wear the hijab. It is a sign of chastity and meant to safeguard us as much as possible. It visually marks us as Muslim women, so that we may be openly recognized as such, thus, we stand out.

As a young woman, I refuse to be judged by my physical attributes and beauty. A person’s worth and intellectual ability should not be judged by society’s beauty standards. Instead, a person’s worth should be measured by their mindset and actions. I have come to learn over time that my hijab serves as a source of protection, rather than becoming a barrier in my day-to-day activities.

My research confirmed this was the right path for me. I began to want to wear the headscarf because it was part of my identity as a Muslim woman and distinguished me from others. Therefore, as I started ninth grade, I wore the hijab over my head confidently, ready to start this new chapter in my life. Not only did I never feel judged by anyone, I felt more empowered.

While I proudly wear the hijab today, I am glad I had those earlier doubts, which I was successfully able to overcome. That uncertainty gave me the opportunity to find the true essence of the hijab. The day I began having full faith in my decision was a turning point in my life. This phase in my life taught me that having faith in myself will always be enough for me to stay motivated and accomplish anything I set my sights on. While I was determined to wear the hijab, I simply needed the reassurance to remind myself that I am doing this for myself, and not for the approval of others, including my own family members.

The hijab will continue to define me, my character, and my values. I will always continue to grow with it. My faith puts great emphasis on seeking education and serving humanity. I strive to pursue those goals diligently, with the objective that one day I can serve humanity to the best of my knowledge and abilities.

Now, every time I put it on and step out, I feel protected and safe. It strengthens my faith and connects me firmly to its roots and values. I am confident in and proud of the identity I have made for myself and I embrace being different. I am proud to be a Pakistani-American Muslim woman.

About the Author:

Tooba Malik is currently a senior in high school in the USA. She is looking forward to attending college next fall. She enjoys community service and sharing her experiences as a young adult. She loves traveling, baking/cooking, and visiting new trails near her.

The post Strength and Growth in My Hijab appeared first on World Hijab Day.

I was raised as a Sunni Muslim all of my life, but living in the states after 9/11, I was very afraid to wear my hijab because I didn’t want people to dislike me or think I supported terrorism. For 12 years I hadn’t worn a hijab in public. And then Ramadan of 2014 came, and ALLAH placed confidence, modesty, and a love for humility in my heart. I put my hijab back on July 7,2014. And I’ve never looked back. I have never felt more beautiful and confident.

Yes, people at work, especially my boss began to look at and treat me differently but I did not care.

The beautiful part of this entire story is there was a guy who came into my job all the time, but never spoke a word to me. The day I decided to wear my hijab he approached my desk and asked me “why are you covering your hair today? Did you become a Muslim?” I was afraid to answer at first, but then I decided to answer confidently. I explained to him that I had always been Muslim and that it was my religious holy month of Ramadan and I decided to return to my tradition and wear my hijab. I turned out that this guy was also a Muslim, from Alexandria Egypt, and was so inspired by my bravery and decision to wear my hijab even though people had become islamophobic. On July 28,2014, after eid prayer the guy met my Abi (father) and the rest of my family, and in unbeknownst to me exchanged numbers with my father. On October 28,2014 he asked my Abi for my hand. On January 10,2015 he and I had our Nikkah (wedding) and have been inseparable since!

I’d like to testify that my hijab is my strength and pride, and without I would have my wonderful husband and beautiful family!

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Today (World Hijab Day) was a beautiful day. I am so grateful for the opportunity to walk a mile in someone else’s life, even for just one day. There are very few people that are indifferent to the hijab and I experienced both sides today.

Major life lesson- My eyes are opened to subtleties of racism. In my mind, racism is big hate filled gestures. I saw today that those incidents are rare. It takes the form of passive actions. It’s opening my own door a lot more than normal. It is someone’s eyes to the floor in the elevator. It’s the lady behind me at Kroger stepping back and white knuckling her cart when I turned around and smiled (what did she think I was going to do, attack her with my Flonase?!?!?!). It breaks my heart to know that people experience actions like this everyday. It has strengthened my resolve to choose love and be kind to everyone.

The counter energy to the racism is love. There are a lot of kind and gentle people. This was also very subtle but obvious. It was a girl catching my eye and giving me a warm smile. It was a compliment on my beautiful scarf. It was a thumbs up as he walked by my cube while I was on a call. It strengthened my resolve to be visible in my activism (this is soooooo hard for me. I want to be kindness to be anonymous).

The best part of my day was lunch. After I hid all my crazy hair, my eyebrows were all like, “OMG, look at me!!!!” So I went to have them threaded. Once the lady realized why I was wearing the hijab, she told everyone else in the salon. We talked a little about right of choice. She asked to take a picture with me and to post it. She was so happy to have a champion for her rights and they were all very gracious for support. I could see the worry and tension on their faces melt away, if only for a few moments when they were in the presence of an ally. This strengthened my resolve to be kind, always fight injustice, #RiseUp and #Resist.

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I wasn’t a born Muslim.  I was raised as a Christian, Seventh- Day Adventist to be exact. And some things in Christianity that I found to be very similar to Islam were: We preferred eating halal/kosher, valued modesty and stayed away from alcohol, unclean meats (pork, etc.) and these were very relevant to me.

So, as a practicing Christian, I had no intentions other than to please God. I abided by all of those morals.  One Sabbath morning, I came to Church with an ankle length dark purple dress accompanied with a simple tan colored scarf covering my hair which was my personal idea of what modesty was but to others, it seemed  way too extreme and offensive for Church.

Throughout the day, I endured comments from Church goers including children and adults; “ISIS has arrived”, “You know you look like that lady, I think she was Mahatma Gandhi’s wife”, “Hey! Salam alaikum – aaaah! just kidding with you”, all followed by playful laughs.  That day, my grandmother received several complaints from sisters in the Church. I even got into a huge verbal feud with one of the sisters in my Church on my views on modesty. I always made sure to tell people that I was only doing this because the Bible said so:

According to 1 Corinthians 11:  “that you remember me in all things and keep the traditions just as I delivered them to you… Every woman who prays or prophesies with her head uncovered dishonors her head, for that is one and the same if her head was shaved…For this reason a woman ought to have the symbol of authority on their head, because of the angels.”

After that encounter with my Church, my confidence in following what the Holy Bible had taught me eventually ended up diminishing.  Often, people said things like: “Because times have changed we don’t participate in things like that”, “Jesus died for our sins so we don’t have to do that anymore”, “That was the old ways of Babylon so we no longer do that”, “Wrap it another way and not like a Muslim”, “It’s not good to wear it like that. People will think you worship Allah instead of God.”, “There are others ways to be modest. Why do you have to dress like that?”, “You are beautiful just the way you are. Just take that scarf off already.” Their comments didn’t really affect me much, but it did make me wonder, as Christians, why are we not modeling what the Bible taught us when the Muslims and even Jews were doing it and they don’t even claim the Bible as their Holy Book?

Eventually months later, on October 25, 2016, I started wearing the hijab consistently. However, before leading up to that moment, a couple of people played a major role in my life, when deciding if I should even look into Islam or not.  They were the ones who often cleared up most of my misconceptions of Islam, exchanged phone numbers with me, got to know me over milkshakes, a quick sit-down in the park or even dinner and referred me to so many of the resources to learn about Islam which still currently exist in my life today.

But I was convinced that I wanted to wear the hijab by mid- August but I just wasn’t sure how I could actually go about doing it. I confided in my mother, but I feared the rest of my family wouldn’t approve of me adapting to these new concepts of modesty and almost a foreign lifestyle to them. Transitioning into wearing the Hijab while in high school, was a bit difficult for me but it wasn’t anything that I couldn’t handle. By the first month, my family, school, and Church buddies all got used to it but the remarks remained.

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Today, I am simply here to share with you my personal experience in hope that you may find some meaning and sense of inspiration in what I have to say. As I sat down and attempted to write this several times, I realized how personal my Hijab story actually is because no amount of words can truly do the experience justice. That being said, I’m just going to dive right in.

Raised in a Muslim family, I was brought up with the basic, fundamental principles and values that Islam infuses. I was taught to pray, to fast, to be kind-hearted, generous and to share the Deen of Allah graciously with those around me. As a Muslim growing up amongst Muslims, Islam was my second nature. It was when I entered University that I realized I never really understood what Hijab meant. I often thought that it was just a Muslim woman’s obligation to Allah (SWT), not understanding the true concept of it. I soon came to realize the Hijab was the perfect outlet for women to seek liberation, respect and ultimate freedom from sexual harassment and the likes.

However, like many people, there was a point in my life where I was at an all time low. My Imaan (faith) was unstable. It was at this time in my life, I contemplated on removing my Hijab. I had sometimes felt that wearing Hijab did not allow me to reach my true potential. The harder I tried to fit in, the more frustrated I became. I often felt that I couldn’t participate in certain activities with my Hijab and so this feeling had taken me down a road that I never want to travel on again.

My first and last attempt to remove my Hijab was at an audition for a beauty pageant competition at my University. I decided that this was my first step to becoming an international model so I decided to give it a go. I did audition with my Hijab and was chosen to be among the competing 14 girls. As the competition progressed, my conscience got to me, some of my Muslim friends stopped talking to me and often times, I found myself wearing my Hijab for some of the events and not wearing it for others. This made me feel like the biggest hypocrite in the world. I felt as though I was cheating myself out of who I really was and what I stood for. There were even some Muslim sisters who had spread spiteful rumours about me and shared pictures of me without my Hijab from one of the pageant’s photo shoots. With all of these thoughts racing through my mind, day in and day out, finally I said to myself, “Naballah, look at the big picture!” Now, when I say big picture, I don’t mean next week, or in a few months or even 20 years down the road. I mean the Akhira – the Hereafter. I asked myself a very straightforward question. Who am I trying to please? These strangers who I know not or Allah? I finally convinced myself that it was time for me to take this step closer to Allah, as difficult as it may have seemed at the time. Eventually I withdrew from the competition.

It was at that point that I decided it was time to put some more thought into this whole ‘Hijab’ issue.  And I did. I contemplated the thought of the Hijab, and what it really means to be a Hijabi woman. It was at that very moment that I said, “Allah, I will put this Hijab back on because I believe in my heart that You have asked me to do so. Please guide me and give me the strength to do this.” Now, I can honesty tell you that I have never felt more free or more at peace with myself and the world around me. In all fairness I will be honest and tell you that it wasn’t an easy thing to do when I removed my Hijab. Quite frankly, it was probably the most difficult challenge I’ve had to face in my life. Isn’t it ironic how that works? The things that will benefit us most and that make the most sense are often those we fail to realize or have difficulty accepting. To me, the Hijab not only represents an obligation, modesty, purity, righteousness and protection, but truly is the ultimate state of respect and liberation. Alhamdullilah, I am free! For me, that episode was a defining moment in my life. I believe that Allah (SWT) guides whom He pleases and I was tearfully happy that He had guided me back on the straight path of life, and I’m never going to be lost again.

Looking back on the pageant, I realized it’s really just a way of exploiting women. Giving them false confidence based on “bearing-it-all”. I often ask myself why do these women need to strip down into a bra and underwear (sometimes totally naked with hands hiding parts) to prove their worth? Now that I look back at who I was then, it makes me grateful to Allah (SWT) to see how far He has brought me. For a time, I was confused and somewhat lost, as are many young women – trying desperately to fit in to a society that dictates that beauty is naked, emaciated women on billboards selling perfume and underwear. I recently read that some of those models and actors that I once adored practically have to kill themselves to look the way they do. From face-lifts to lipo-suction. Some even go as far as having their ribs removed so they can have tiny waists! It finally dawned on me that the images being flashed in front of me 24 hours a day could not possibly be true representations women’s liberation. I was convinced that there had to be a simpler answer somewhere.

When I look around today I see so many Muslim women excelling in diverse spheres of life- it would be silly and ignorant to think that you can’t reach your full potential as a Hijabi woman. To my sisters who aspire to or have recently started wearing Hijab and are facing any of the issues that I did, my advice is make Dua (prayer) to Allah (SWT) and seek knowledge to keep reminding yourself that Hijab is your protection and beauty and you ARE just as beautiful if not more with it on. There is nothing sweeter and more fulfilling in this world than Islam and Hijab. It is an honor for me to be a symbol of my religion with my appearance, and of course with my actions. I know it is the best for me to be modest in the way that Allah SWT wants me to be. I encourage any girl who is considering wearing Hijab to READ about it first.  Read the actual verses in Qur’an and their Tafseer and talk to sheikhs or people who are knowledgeable in Islam. And if you wear it, wear it to make Allah please with you, not for anyone or anything else. I know that I am not a perfect Muslim, but I am striving to be a better one, and I hope that I will be one of the good examples of Muslim women. I will not lie and say that wearing Hijab is easy and that Shaytan has never played around with my head. People fail to realize that being from a certain religion or culture doesn’t mean you don’t have the same temptations, desires and feelings. There was anger, frustration and sadness, but in the end there was also confidence, liberation and peace. I discovered who I wanted be and how I wanted people to see me. The Hijab itself doesn’t make me religious or make me do certain things while preventing me from others. To me, it’s a reminder to be a good person and it gives me confidence as a young Muslim woman. I realized that Hijab made me focus on my inner self more. Some people think that veiled women are oppressed, but I feel more empowered than ever, even though I did struggle to come to terms with it at first. It is not easy to wear Hijab, especially in a society that constantly keeps telling us to dress in as little as possible. Trust me; there is nothing the Dunya (world) can give you that Islam can’t. I’ve been there, so take my word! I’ll leave you with some not-so-secret secrets. Yes, I do have hair under this ‘thing’ and it’s black and no, I don’t wear it in the shower, but I can take it off at home. My advice is to keep in contact with sisters or family members who are willing to encourage you and InshaAllah (God willing),  it will get easier for you every day.

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I just wanted to share my story, though it is not nearly as impactful as some I have read here. I am a recent convert and I just started wearing hijab full time on December 20th! I first encountered hijab when I went to study abroad in London, and I met so many women who wore it. Back then I didn’t really understand it and what it meant, but I remember thinking that these women were very beautiful, and I always wondered what I could do to look like that.

When I was first reading about Islam and contemplating whether or not this was a religion I could adopt for the rest of my life, one of my biggest struggles was the concept of hijab. I’m not a person to do things halfway- either I am a full on scarf wearing Muslim, or I am not a Muslim…I guess I’m a bit extreme like that. But either way, for me the hijab was part and parcel with converting and becoming a Muslim.

For a long time after I knew that Islam was the only thing I could possibly need in my life, I still struggled with the idea of the hijab. I dressed decently modestly to begin with, and besides, I liked my hair! Not to mention wearing short sleeves in the summer! I also struggled with what my family and friends would think.
When I started up my senior year at university here, I decided to try it out in small steps. I started wearing it every Friday for Jummah prayers (it was like casual Fridays, but better!) The first few times I wore it out, I had a weird tightness in my throat, kind of like my scarf was strangling me. But as the weeks wore on I found that when I encountered my friends out and about they treated me just the same, and alhamdulillah my mom is very supportive as well. I came to look forward to dressing up on Fridays, and became a little jealous of the friends I have that already wore it full time.

So I went to an event at the local masjid one Friday night, and the next morning I just woke up and put it back on. Since that day I have been a full time hijabi, and I have no regrets! Yes, it kind of sucks going to the gym in long sleeves and flowy pants, , yes it has been difficult to convert my entire wardrobe to be hijab friendly, and yes I get rude comments and looks pretty often. But I have my intention and I know why I chose this, and I have no regrets!

I hope that during this year’s World Hijab Day women from all over can connect with each other and learn about why different people dress the way they do, and take those first crucial steps towards understanding.

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I get asked quite often why I reverted and what lead me to Islam? So I thought I’d tell you all.
I didn’t have a good start in life. I was abandoned in a crack house at  the age of 14 months. I was there for 2 days before I was found. I was passed around the care system for a while before I was placed with a loving foster Mom. I always yearned for my real mother; she was allowed to see me the 1st Saturday of every month, but she would never come. I’d be sad, waiting for her looking out the window. I would be heartbroken but my foster mom would always be there to hug me when I felt rejected.

At 14, I turned into a “wild child.” I started smoking, drinking, and hanging around with the wrong people. I started running away from home to my birth mother but she would reject me and shut the door in my face, but as always, my foster mom held me close and loved me.

At 17, I started going to the local pub. I was naive. I got pregnant with my son Dylan at the age of 17. I raised him alone. He is now 18 and has never met his dad. When I was 19, I met a Muslim man and got pregnant with Omar. His dad has always been in and out of his life. Omar is now 15. I spent most my 20’s feeling lost and unwanted, so I drank more, smoked more weed to forget about life.

Last year in September, I went to a 24 hr rave (party). I think I lasted about 18 hrs. I just sat in my room and cried and cried and asked God for help for strength, for guidance. I must have passed out from drinking. When I was awake a few hours later, I was overwhelmed with a feeling. I knew what I wanted. I knew what I had to do and for the first time ever, I felt strong enough. I detoxed my body. It took about 3 days. I was shaking and as I was detoxing myself and trying to better myself, I found out I had been betrayed in the worst way possible; stabbed in the back by people who I thought cared about me. I was devastated. All I wanted was a drink but I didn’t. I was so proud of myself.

Once I knew my body was clean from drink and drugs, I took my Shahadah (testimony of Islamic faith). Wow! Amazing! I was free. I felt new. I felt relieved that I would never pick up another drink. Islam to me is more than a religion. I believe it really saved my life.

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People ask me why do I wear Hijab, my simple answer is – one I want people to see my true beauty rather than focusing on false diminishing worldly beauty. Two – I don’t believe in showoff but prefer being a pearl hidden in a shell, lying deep down beneath the ocean. Three – hijaab is my identity, I can wear jazzy clothes but I chose to live a simple life for it showcases my religion/belief.

Assumptions: People look at me with an amaze in their eyes ( good/bad/strange/old fashioned/alien from other planet/oppressed/yeah terrorist too). No, apart from the first point mentioned none of them are correct. I love being fashionable and I’m very much aliened with the current fashion trends. No, I’m not oppressed and no one enforced hijab on me, but I chose it cause I love it. Do not know about alien from other planet but would like to be considered as an angel. (Joking)

Experiences: I have observed the security team checking my bag twice for me just wearing the hijaab, but I have always observed patience with them thinking one day they will realize and will treat me normally. If compared before and after Hijaab, I have seen flirty men don’t stare at me anymore, many changed their perspective. I have noticed respect in many stares and everyone demands respect.

God: Beyond being everything said, it’s a sign of my submission to my Master/Lord. I’m in love with my creator for thy has created the good, the bad and then guided His creation to protect themselves and others from the evil start – the start could be a single gaze. No this is not an introvert thought but a deep subject to explore. I have experienced and would say hijab is a shield that covers from lustful gaze:

“O Prophet! Say to your wives, your daughters, and the women of the believers that: they should let down upon themselves their jalabib.” [Quran 33:59]

“…and not display their beauty except what is apparent, and they should place their khumur over their bosoms…” [Quran 23:31]

Hijab is necessary not just restricted to clothing but one should observe hijab in the way you communicate, choice of words, and observe hijab in your actions.

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I reverted to Islam on  April 24, 2015. And I started wearing the hijab two weeks after I took my Shahada (testimony of Islamic faith). It wasn’t easy for me because my family is against my decision to become a Muslim. One of my daughters even told me that she doesn’t want to have anything to do with me. My mom cried and begged me to leave Islam. But I know Islam is the true religion and I thank Allah that I have been chosen to be one of His servants.

I believe that one day my family will accept me and insha Allah they will be reverted too in Islam. I am proud to be a Muslim and I show it by covering myself and using my hijab.

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I am 24 and recently reverted to Islam. I have been wearing hijab for just over three months now.

I don’t just like my hijab, I love it. It has become such a part of me and I would feel very off without it. The first day that I started wearing it, it just felt so right.

My hijab is not a burden or a pain or a nuisance. It is not hot or itchy. It is not in the way, annoying, or cumbersome. It is not time consuming or ugly. It is not oppressive or restrictive; it does not prevent me from doing anything. My hijab is nothing bad, nothing negative, and nothing harmful.

My hijab is pretty and nice and awesome. It is comfortable, warm, and protective. My hijab is empowering and powerful.

My hijab reminds me that I am always in the presence of Allah swt. It reminds me of my faith and to stay strong in it.

My hijab says please don’t be negative around me; I don’t have room for your darkness. It says make small talk with me. It says I am strong. It says look at me with respect; look at me not my body; have interest in me not my body. It says please refrain from hitting on me because I do not need your remarks.

I would take what I have now over what I used to have any day. People do not hit on me; I do not get cat-calls. I can just go out and not be bothered, or if people talk to me there is no underlying intention.

My hijab lets me know that I am too beautiful, too precious, and too important to be put on display. It tells me that I am something more than I ever realized.

That is why I choose to not only wear, but love my hijab.

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