I started wearing the hijab in 1999 but there were times when I would take it off and flaunt my trendy hair. I was not born a Muslim but  converted out of love and marriage which now I believe is the turning point of my life. Allah wanted me to find peace through faith and it has guided me on my every day life.

Allah paved the way for me and since coming home from the Hajj (pilgrimage) last October, I do not leave the house without my hijab on. It made me understand that I am a woman in this dunya (world) and I serve only Allah and I have to heed Prophet Muhammad’s teachings – A woman needs to cover up and be modest for her own good.

Yes, people stare at someone with revealing clothing and styled hair. But when you die, woman, will that bring you closer to God? That was in my head ever since my stay in Madinah and Makkah for the Hajj. Will Allah be pleased with me? Will my husband love me more? Will my Christian family like the new me?

In my heart, there is only one thing that I value. What will become of me on the day of judgment? I fear therefore I obey, I submit, and I surrender myself.

My hijab and my abaya (long over garment) is keeping me on the right track. My prayers, so far, has been answered. My stresses has been relieved. I feel beautiful in my own special way.

Discrimination? Oh yes plenty! I was belittled for wearing the hijab but it did not stop me. Taxi drivers refuse to take me to where I want to go. Security guards at malls stop me and take a long time searching my things. Some people even raise their eyebrows and talk to me as if I am uneducated! I fought, sab’r (stay patient), I struggled. As long as it is not Allah who will discriminate but only people in this dunya for my choices, then, I am ready…

My simple explanation to those who ask me why I cover up?: I WANT TO BE LIKE MARY (Mother of Jesus (PBUH)) WHO WEARS THE ABAYA AND HIJAB AS WELL. You can see her in the Christian pictures wearing such, right? And then, I stop and smile.

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I have been wearing Hijab for approximately four years and I am proud to say “I am a hijabi!” At times, wearing the hijab was challenging and felt degrading to my confidence, but the few challenges that I faced made me bond stronger to my head scarf. Some may say “the head scarf is oppressing women!” But, let me tell you, as someone who is currently wearing the hijab, my head scarf makes me feel stronger and empowering; and I guarantee that other ladies who wear the hijab can say the exact same. Wearing the hijab, however, is not just covering our hair, it can be thought of as a verb. We act upon it everyday when we put a piece of fabric on our head and head out the door. We look up to our role model Marriam (Jesus’ beloved mother), and follow her footsteps by acting with kindness, acting with modesty, and acting with humility – just like the famous saying “kill them with kindness.

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I was born and raised as Catholic. I am now a revert to Islam, Alhamdulillah. I started wearing my hijab in October of last year and I never removed it since then. At first it was tough, my family and friends were not very accepting of it, but sooner they respected my decision and accepted it.

Our purpose can be reflected even in the clothes we choose to wear. If our intention is to please Allah when we choose our dress, that action in itself becomes an act of worship. Hence, the very choice of one piece of clothing over another is an act of worship in Islam. Many people refer to hijab as a “personal choice”. Yes. It is a personal choice. It is a personal choice to submit to God rather than the fashion of the society. It is a choice to be beautiful to God rather than to people. And it is a choice to cover and dignify the body Allah gave you rather than give in to a culture that encourages women to be sex objects who sell their bodies like market beer.

However, hijab should not just be seen as a cloth one puts on the head. Rather hijab is a symbol of our worship and servitude to God. It is a symbol of modesty, that is not just about our attire or physical appearance. It extends to our whole demeanor, actions, ideas and character.

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