After having given birth to two beautiful, intelligent, and caring daughters, my heart yearned for a son! My husband’s, too, although he never mentioned it.  Often, I felt guilty for desiring such a thing, but we do not have control over our hearts and our feelings. It is what we do with it that matters. Finally, I accepted that this was what I wanted and started researching if this was possible in a natural way. 

At first, I read books on this and tracked my ovulation as a result. With difficulty tracking ovulation, however, I eagerly downloaded an app as guidance. Excited, I took pictures of my ovulation stick, uploaded them, and received feedback on whether or not it was my peak!

Furthermore, I did istighfar (to ask Allah for forgiveness) which is a type of dhikr; it is done by many statements, like saying: “Astaghfirullah.” Shaykh ^Abdullaah said to recite “rabbighfir lee wa lil mu’mineenah wal mu’minaat” رابغفيرلي والمؤمنينه والمؤمنات

27 times a day for a particular du’a to be accepted. The best time to do du^aa’ is the tahajjud. We were blessed it was Ramadan, so waking up for tahhajjud was slightly easier. We made one supplication consistently: for Allah (SubHaana wata^aala) to grant us a baby boy.  This continued until my 20-week scan, and there it was, confirmed: I was having a boy! 

Difficulty was an understatement during the last trimester, as I suffered from many Braxton hicks. Therefore, preparation commenced at week 36: six (6) dates a day, raspberry leaf tea, walks and relaxation.  Consequently, in Week 38, on December 31st, sleep became nonexistent; watching the fireworks with my husband through the window was my highlight. Additionally, my teachers taught me that whoever says, “I ask Allah, the One Who is the only God, the Hayy, the Qayyum, and I repent to Him,” will still receive forgiveness even if he has left the required battlefield. I recited Hayyu ya Qayyum 3000 times as advised, had a shower at 6 a.m., and tried to fall back asleep at 9 a.m. until my water broke! My third child was born four hours later: a baby boy! 

Raising a boy frightened me to the core of my bones. I had anxieties and negative thoughts, lurking thoughts that I won’t be a very good boy mum. One year on, and I am trying to find my way through the jungle and rollercoaster of negative thoughts. The consequences of getting it wrong are severe. Often, people tend to say, “He’s a boy” every time I mention any sign of struggle: 

“He’s so clingy” – he’s a boy. 

“He doesn’t eat very well”- he’s a boy. 

“He won’t sleep through the night”- he’s a boy. 

What can I do to help myself through this? How can I ensure I do my best? I recommend dhikr and du^aa’. Consequently, I find peace of mind in prayer and I learned, through experience, what my children need (regardless of gender): validation of their feelings, empathy and playing/spending time. For example, I have to validate the fear of my thirteen-year-old feels when she has to walk into school late because people will stare at her. I have to empathize with her and understand her embarrassment and fear, and I need to spend time talking through these feelings with her so she can articulate them, embrace them, and tackle them. 

Moreover, I need to validate the anger my six-year-old feels when she has to share her chocolate, empathize and understand why she wouldn’t want to share, and play with her so she learns to take turns and share her sweets. 

Furthermore, I have to validate my one-year-old’s tantrum when he doesn’t want his nappy changed, empathize and understand that for him, it’s not important; he doesn’t mind smelling; play with him and make eye contact; articulate sounds and words so he may learn and grow. Nonetheless, through these connections, we raise our children, we pray that they’ll grow up to become amazing, articulate, confident, and righteous human beings, Ameen.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:

Hafizah Choudhury was born and raised in the UK, Birmingham. She is married with two beautiful daughters and a son. She is a secondary school science teacher in Wiltshire, UK in a small town called Calne. In her spare time Hafizah tutors science, including Chemistry A level and she has passion for teaching, learning Islamic studies, and nasheeds. 

Instagram @hufayzah

The post The Power of Dhikr and Du’a appeared first on World Hijab Day.

The entire life of believers in this world is for the purpose of worship. Allah, the Exalted, has created humans specifically for His worship. However, in addition to the general time for worship throughout the year, there are some special seasons of worship for believers. These special seasons of worship come with special rewards. Therefore, it is necessary for us to prepare ourselves specifically for worship during these special seasons. In order to attain success Hereafter, we should strive to perform more and more good deeds during these seasons of worship. It is important to welcome these special times through beautiful preparations.

We have entered the honoured month of Dhul-Hijjah in our calendar, which is esteemed in the sight of Allah. After the departure of Ramadan and we return to our regular busy schedule, it is inevitable that the spirit of worship loosens and our connection with Allah fades a bit. This is why this month should be taken as a chance to revive the spirit we gained during Ramadan. Let us see how we can do that:  

Self-Purification through Tawbah:

First and foremost, we must keep in mind that we have a special opportunity to purify ourselves on the beloved days of Allah. The more we immerse into self-purification, the higher the chance of our success in self-improvement. Instead of searching for faults and flaws in others, we should strive for self-improvement first. Those who have sincerely reflected upon themselves have forsaken the faults of others. It is necessary not to surrender ourselves to our desires but rather to control our desires firmly. We should protect ourselves as much as possible from all major and minor sins that are facilitated by Satan and our desires. We must remember that we may not be able to perform abundant good deeds, but we should strive to save ourselves from sins as much as possible because even small sins can lead us to Hellfire.

But as a human and by default, we are prone to committing sins. Therefore, we need to develop the habit of continuous repentance, or Tawbah. Repentance can be done at any time, but there are certain times when Allah (Subhanahu wa Ta’ala) accepts the repentance of His servants more. Like Ramadan, the first ten days of Dhul-Hijjah are also such special days when Allah (Subhanahu wa Ta’ala) grants His servants the opportunity to repent and accepts their repentance.

Just as putting clean water in a glass with impurities will make the water impure, similarly, performing righteous deeds without repenting and carrying the impurity of sins in the heart will diminish their value. That is why it is necessary to purify the heart through repentance.

There are conditions for repentance. Sincere repentance will only occur when three characteristics are present:

1. The sin must be completely abandoned.

2. One must sincerely regret committing the sin.

3. Firm determination must be made to not repeat the sin in the future.

Repentance means to turn back or return. Due to the temptation of Satan and the self, humans commit many sins. But if one realizes their mistakes, feels remorse in their heart, turns back to Al-Ghaffar (the Forgiver), seeks His mercy, repents, and makes a firm resolution not to commit those sins again, that is repentance. Allah (Subhanahu wa Ta’ala) is greatly pleased with the repentance of His servants. When sincere repentance is done, Allah forgives all sins and transforms them into good deeds. Allah (Subhanahu waTa’ala) has also stated:

“But whoever repents, believes, and does righteousness, then they will be among the successful.” (Surah Al-Qasas: 67)

Time Consciousness:

In addition to repentance, we must also be careful about another valuable aspect that we are rapidly losing, which is the passing of time. If we can make the most out of our valuable time, it will be beneficial for both our worlds, by the permission of Allah. The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) has warned us about time and said, “There are two blessings in which many people incur loss: health and free time.” (Bukhari: 6412)

In order to increase self-purification and the quantity of good deeds, the less time spent online, the better. Facebook, in particular, is an excellent medium for wasting time. Perhaps there are some good things that happen here, such as giving or receiving religious knowledge, but in many cases, people unknowingly become busy with other matters. Sometimes, online activities may increase your knowledge, but they will not increase your deeds. It is better to allocate the majority ofyour time to beneficial activities and not become excessively involved in irrelevant matters.

Spending excessive time online can cause delays in performing prayers or cause one to lose focus during prayers. Even though you may desire it, perhaps a lot of worship is not done. However, Abdullah ibn Mas’ud was very conscious about this matter! He said, “I am not more regretful over any day that has passed from my life in which no good deeds were done.”

Therefore, if there is any necessity online, whether it be reading something, reciting Quran, or listening to a lecture, allocate specific time for it. Keep your efforts uninterrupted. The Helper is Allah, the Highest. Those who are sincere in His cause, He will surely guide them on His path. Indeed, Allah says, “And whoever strives for Us – We will surely guide them to Our ways. And indeed, Allah is with the doers of good.” (Surah Al-Ankabut: 69)

About the author:

Sumaiya Rabeya is a researcher and content writer. She is the co-founder of a Malaysia-based media-production company. Sumaiya is also a community volunteer, actively working on various projects related to Islamic dawah, social engagement and women. Born in 1989, she graduated with a degree in Politics and International Relations and is currently pursuing her Ph.D. in Gender Studies. Moreover, she has been working as a media content writer for over a decade. As a Bengali young mother, she feels responsible in creatively contributing to society.

The post Embracing the Blessed Seasons: A Journey of Self-Purification and Worship appeared first on World Hijab Day.

I was born and raised in Spain in a Moroccan family. I always loved my religion, Alhamdulillah (God-Graciously) and I loved to learn about it. But I never liked the hijab and never thought that I could wear it. One day I watched a video about Allah  Subhanaho (All-Praised) saying: ‘I respond to the call of the caller’, the Sheikh was saying that look at the Creator, He is saying that He will answer any call. He did not say only a good person, a Muslim or a non-Muslim. He just said ‘the caller’. I was shocked.

I always got excited and happy to learn something new about Allah and Islam, but it was very different this time. I asked myself that the Creator of everything said that He will answer the call of a caller but what did I do for Him? Then I thought that it is an honor to worship Allah and got up to pray. I made my wudhu (ablution) like I never did before, with all my heart. I was super excited because I wanted to pray to Allah (I prayed since always but never with such humility and emotions).

When I stood up for Salah (Islamic Prayer) and said ‘Allahu Akbar’ ( Allah is the Greatest), I started to cry. My heart was crying. I felt as if my chest was enlightened with His Divine Light. I cannot describe it. Then in sujud (prostration), I prayed with all my heart: “Ya- Allah ( O Allah!) You say that You answer any call, so please answer me and make me one of the Muslimahs that Muhammad salallaho aleyhi wa salam (Peace be upon him) will be proud of.” I didn’t say anything about the hijab in the dua’a (supplication).

I went to sleep and the next day, I decided to wear the hijab (October 1st,  2013). Everybody was surprised, but I felt like nothing could stop me. I’m not only in love with my hijab, but with Allah sebhanaho wa ta’ala (All Praise to Him) and Muhammad salallaho aleyhi wa salam (Peace be upon him). There’s no happiness like feeling yourself close to Allah. A lot of things have changed in my life for the better since then.

Jazzak’Allah khair ( May Allah reward you) for reading my story. Keep me in your dua’a(supplication).

The post The Call Answered appeared first on World Hijab Day.