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My struggle with the hijab was a difficult one

By Farheen Naqi (India)

Although I live in India now, as a teen, living on a remote island with almost no Muslims (let alone Hijab-wearing women) my struggle with the hijab was a difficult one. Although I always had love for Allah in my heart, the guilt of not obeying Him to the best of my ability was always in the back of my mind. At the time I never thought about it, but now I see and commend my mother’s bravery and spirit to stick with her decision to never stop wearing it even though I know it wasn’t easy.

I thought putting on the hijab would change who I was completely, and I was right. I’m not saying it was this magical cloth that changed me as soon as I put it on, but slowly it started to influence my decisions without me even realising it. I started to think about how my actions would affect the image of my Muslim sisters and I found myself saying no to anything that would show Muslims in a bad light, which at the same time helped me sin less.

This year’s going to be the first time I go back to the island where I grew up with a scarf on my head. When I first started wearing the hijab, I lost a lot of confidence & I couldn’t imagine going back there for years to come. Somehow, mysteriously Allah’s strength found me and I’m now looking forward to go back to my home.

Most importantly it got me closer to Allah and my Deen (religion), and I know this is just the beginning.

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